Depression

I thought it was going to be a real struggle, thought i would try and find a man to help me out and tried to be around people who could make me smile but that made it all worse, i left him because i found that i was having a better just chilling with friends and having quiet drinks after work with the work mates. Things like this get some people down in life but everyday i go to work i smile because i know that i have people there who will make sure that im okay and if i am having a shit day they will make me smile. I would think about my hunny all the time but it just wasn’t working out at all i mean if im having a better time at work where they make me smile every minute of the day and make laugh instead of being with my man who just made me feel so shit then wouldn’t you leave him? Some people might say that i made the wrong decision about leaving him but i think it was the right one. If anyone out there has this thing called depression don’t let it get to you and don’t be shy about self harming, as i have realized now and after listening to the Battle Scars by Guy Sebastian i look at my scars and think this is showing the world that i can fight this war with smiles and laughs and have a good time and not have to rely on pills to make me smile everyday instead of giving up and ending it all. Yeah for sure some days i wanna give up and give in but i know that there are people all around me that will feel it, my family, work mates, extended friends and family, and possibly the wider community because once a young one takes their life its a sad sad thing, i mean yeah it is sad when people take their own life but we have to think of the shit they had to go through some times it might just have been to much on their plate. I hear idiots walking around school pointing and laughing at people who cry and have scars on their arm saying stuff like “they just doing it for the attention” but its not until you get the sad news that you now have to live with depression, i managed to find a way to cope with it but i know some people just cant. When i turned up to work with fresh cuts by best work mate asked how i was and all i could was look at him with sad eyes and pull up my sleeves and show him but did he care? No he didn’t he smiled and said “oh mate, you should come to the concert with me and my friends its going to be a mean set up out there” and for the rest of the day he made sure i was okay and was having a good time, he made me smile the whole day and made sure that i didn’t have one moment where i wanted to cry and im grateful as anything to have him in my life.

All we need when we have depression is people that can make us smile and people that wont bring us down.

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